Sid's Recovery

"The light of the body is the eye: therefore when thine eye is single, thy whole body also is full of light; but when thine eye is evil, thy body also is full of darkness." (Luke 11:34)

God invites us to take inventory of both the "light" and the "darkness" of our innermost being. "Take heed therefore that the light which is in thee be not darkness." (Luke 11:35).

When God led me to introspection for the first time, it was really scary because I found mostly darkness, with very little light. Had I not already experienced victory through third-step surrender, it would have devastated me. But as it was, I had hope. I knew that God could bring light into my life -- with my cooperation -- and that gave me the courage to acknowledge the darkest parts of my inner-being. As a result, God began the process of replacing that darkness with light.

"If thy whole body therefore be full of light, having no part dark, the whole shall be full of light, as when the bright shining of a candle doth give thee light." (Luke 11:36). This is my hope and my goal. I must admit that not all is light in my soul, but God is faithful and continues bring more and more light into my life (dispelling the darkness), as I continue to be willing to trust and obey.

PRAISE GOD FROM WHOM ALL BLESSINGS FLOW!

"Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." (Step 4)

Failure in understanding about turning my will over to God is what kept me in my addictions for 25 years. And, as I have associated with many people who want a better life, it has been my observation that it is nearly always failure to embrace this principle that keeps them from progressing in their recovery process. Based on my experience, I have a theory as to why this is. I believe that, when we practice this principle, the powers of evil lose their grip on us, and they will do everything in their evil power to keep us in bondage.

Another reason why this principle is so hard to embrace is that it is painful to surrender ourselves -- even to the loving Higher-Power that CAN restore us to sanity. We would still rather follow our own paths -- doing the same stupid things we've always done, expecting different results. But when I think about it logically, that kind of thinking is just insane, even though my tendency is to go there. The apostle Paul describes the experience we need to have like this: "I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me." (Galatians 2:20).

It is only when I die to doing things my way, at the cross, and surrender my "weak, wavering human will to the omnipotent, unwavering will of God" (Ministry of Healing page 176), that I am able to have the victory over the sin that so easily besets me. This is the key factor that started me into my recovery process and this is the key factor that keeps me in recovery today. When I choose to do it my way, I fail. But, when I choose to surrender my will to God in the moment of temptation, He gives me the victory! PRAISE GOD!

"As the will of man co-operates with the will of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command may be accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings."
(Christ's Object Lessons, page 333)

"Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him." (Step 3)

It's been said that "there are no atheists in foxholes". As we begin to recognize our own powerlessness, as we hide in our "foxholes" from facing the "war" against the evil that so easily besets us (Hebrews 12:1), we begin to realize that there must be a power greater than ourselves that can deliver us, because these battles are just too great for us to be able to fight them on our own.

I think that the God of creation put within us a desire, and a need, to fellowship with Him and to reverence Him as our Lord and Savior, because He is the only God that can bring us true happiness. The trouble is that we tend to look to fill that most basic of all human needs with other gods. Since the God of creation is not a god of control, he lets us make those choices to follow other gods. But those gods do try to control us -- to remove our freedom of choice. Consequentially, we find ourselves in behaviors that become habits that often lead to addictions -- things that forcibly control our lives.

I believe that only the God of creation, the Almighty God of the universe, is able to deliver us from those little gods that forcibly control our lives -- those little gods that force us into our "foxholes" of isolation. Friends, He is able. Yes He is able to do infinitely more than we can even imagine to restore us to sanity.

"Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us, Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen." (Ephesians 3:20-21)

"Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity." (Step 2)