Sid's Recovery

Now that I've identified my major issues in my introspective inventory, and confessed them, I must decide whether I am willing to let these things go. It's not a question as to whether I am able to turn away from my destructive behavior, because I CAN NOT.

My understanding of the question posed to me in 1994, was something like this: "If it were possible for you to stop doing those destructive behaviors that you have identified and confessed, would you? Or, do you want to continue to do things that bring you temporary pleasure, at the cost of lasting pain?" After 25 years of pain, I was ready for something better.

I knew that, of myself, I could do nothing (John 5:19,30). I knew that without God's help I would continue to fail (John 15:5). But would I have faith enough to believe that, "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me." (Philippians 4:13)? Here are some quotes that brought (and continue to bring) me great hope:

"Through the right exercise of the will, an entire change may be made in the life. By yielding up the will to Christ, we ally ourselves with divine power. We receive strength from above to hold us steadfast. A pure and noble life, a life of victory over appetite and lust, is possible to everyone who will unite his weak, wavering human will to the omnipotent, unwavering will of God." (Ministry of Healing page 176)

"As the will of man co-operates with the will of God, it becomes omnipotent. Whatever is to be done at His command may be accomplished in His strength. All His biddings are enablings." (Christ's Object Lessons, page 333)

Even now, as God prompts me to change, I must make a conscience decision to allow God to "will and to do of his good pleasure" (Philippians 2:13) in my life, so that He can continue to remove my defects of character.

"Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." (Step 6)